Have you ever felt like you were born to do or be someone? Most of us will say a doctor, an athlete, a businessman. But how many of us can say we were born to be parents?
As an adolescent boy I loved playing outdoors and hanging out with my brothers and friends. Now that I think about it, I always had tiny crushes on certain girls. I remember my first crush in the 5th grade. Then in the 6th grade, the first girl I ever really found so beautiful was an 8th grader…I still remember her name…Sarah Leathers. Wow, I’m still in shock that I remember that. I also remember my first fight was over a girl. It was obviously a transition period in my life where a boy started going through his pubescent adolescence. During this period of time, I always had two prayers: I would always pray to God that before I die he allow me to 1. lose my virginity and 2. he allow me to have a child. I claim I did both in one shot…that’s how strong my tiny swimmers are!
Obviously prayers changed as I got older, but the mere fact that I was already thinking about having a family at that age just showed that I knew what I wanted.
I am the eldest of four brothers. My youngest brother was born twelve years after me. He was and still is the baby of the family. I remember sneaking into my parents' room early in the mornings to pick up Niko and feed him while rocking him to sleep. I loved it. I enjoyed the feeling of this little person being so dependent on me. I love how babies in general are so dependent on a person. After helping raise my youngest brother I knew that I wanted that for myself.
With my dad regularly out of the country or in the United States for work, my mom would rely on me to raise Niko. She would even have me discipline him. So much so that growing up, Niko didn’t look at me as a brother but more as a father figure. It hurt because I wanted him to look up to me like an older brother the way my other brothers would sometimes look up to me. I wanted him to love me the way a child loved a parent, but I was somewhere in between. I never knew what Niko thought of me as a child but I craved the love and dependency that a child has for his parents.
The day finally came twelve years ago when my then girlfriend became pregnant with our first child. Not the ideal way for this to happen by any means, but it was a blessing in disguise. The emotional rollercoaster that you go through when something like this happens is crazy, to say the least. Georgia had missed her period and decided to take a pregnancy test after our trip to Boracay. It was positive. First thought was…OH SHIT! Then you see your girlfriend crying on the floor and you want to comfort her. Just as you start to comfort her you start to think, great her parents are going to KILL me! So, within a week, we scheduled a doctors appointment in Makati Medical. At the ultrasound appointment, no heartbeat was detected and the doctor said to come back in a week to have a better idea of where we were at. At this point, I had just come to accept the realization that we were going to have a baby and then…wait a second…she might not be pregnant. You could see it in Georgia’s eyes as well…the look of confusion not knowing whether to be happy or not.
So, a week later, we return to Makati Med and have the follow up ultrasound. At this point, we both didn’t know what we wanted more. We go into the room…the doctor does her exam and then it happened…we heard the heartbeat; simultaneously, Georgia and I looked at each other and we had the biggest smiles on our faces. The true emotion and feeling of having a baby surfaced. We were excited, scared, but overjoyed that she was pregnant. We knew we wanted Nadia and we couldn’t be happier.
Twelve years and four kids later Georgia and I are married and so happy to be where we are at. By no means is it easy to raise children. Bt these children bring so much joy and fulfillment to our lives. We couldn’t be happier.
Moral of the story, say your prayers.